I have been providing a nice little view into the mess that is my daily fun. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's not. The last few days have been interesting.
My pseudo S.O. has finally agreed to spend a little time with me. I'm so looking forward to the next couple of weekends. A calm day at my place next weekend, and the following weekend watching football with close friends. It's been months since we had some time to spend together. Not only is he my best friend, but he's also been my biggest supporter over the last year. We only get to see each other a little bit daily. More than an hour requires weeks of planning because of our schedules. So you can imagine my excitement. =)
Last night I sat down and updated my budget. I used to check it almost daily. Now it's become a weekly thing. I think I'm going to go back to daily. I was working out my bills, and getting excited about payday on Monday, when the impending doom struck.... Being broke sucks. It sucks even more when you can see how long you'll be broke. A day or two floating by, I can handle, but a whole month?! *sigh* I will get it figured out. The roomie situation will really help A LOT!
I finally got angry, and sucked up the courage to talk to my husband about the credit card. It's really easy to run me over and take advantage. I let people do it. I know this. It takes me getting REALLY angry before I'll stand up for myself.
Over the last 10 months, he has given me $2200 for the credit card. Keep in mind, that $1400 of that was mine already anyway. Profit from the sale of the house and the economic stimulus check. So, he's given me $800 of his money, while I've paid several thousand to this credit card. He was hurting for money too for awhile. Paying for all the extra bills that came from the house, so I let it go. Now that I'm reaching the bottom of my barrel, I just can't handle it anymore. He was nice enough to meet me today, taking time out of his busy schedule, and I politely laid it all out on the line. After 45 minutes of talking, and figuring out what needs to be done, he handed me $100. I've seen his account, this is money he does NOT have, but considering my situation, I gladly took it. He's always been very understanding, and I could see the guilt smeared all over his face as we talked. He couldn't even look me in the eye through some of it. He felt BAD. So I nicely educate him, that if he didn't go out so much, he'd have more money to put to bills. Then he drops on me, that he's been paying extra to my car, so it could be paid off sooner. *bring on the guilt train ----- CHOO CHOO!* While I appreciate the thought, the car loan has a FAR lower interest rate than the credit card.... But that's beside the point.
So getting to the real point of my story..... Noticing how often he goes out, and how he was never interested in going out when we were together, I dropped the bomb on him..... "So what's her name?"
"Amanda."
The man has a girlfriend! At least he's honest.
Now believe me, I am happy for him. I really am. I can't say that I'm not a little hurt though. He jumped back into the game quick. I know, I look like a hypocrite right?
I've been on ONE date since we decided to split over a year ago. I decided that night that it was just too soon, and I still feel that way. Just because I see Pseudo daily and get the occasional hug, doesn't mean we're in a relationship. Just a really close friend. I can't handle that kind of mess right now. However, we are both patient people. We'll see where the road takes us. Now we understand why he's my Pseudo S.O.? We want to pursue it, just now isn't the right time.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll get over it. I was just REALLY shocked.
Eh, what're ya gonna do?! *shrug*
Have one of my closest friends coming over tonight to hang out. We're doing the divorce thing together. Stinks to know so many people going through the same mess. Anyway, football and good company. How can you go wrong?
My team is decorating their cubes for Halloween. We decided to go with a giant pirate ship! It's awesome! They are really making some progress on it, and I have some pictures on my phone. Once I take them off, I'll be sure to post some on here. W00t!
So on that note, I'm offa here!
Laters!
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